Rambling Autobiography

By Dannielle Antoine


Life for me is hard. I try to find any quote that matches my life or to keep me strong. Any important advice I keep it, save it and sometimes I even remember it. I take walks to keep things off my mind, just to keep me sane. I find sights that aren’t very appealing to people very beautiful. I always look at another view.  I often sit by the levee just watching the water and the sun as it begins to set.  Every now and then I'll see someone pass and they’ll stare or sometimes sit. I’ll wonder if they were there for the same reason I was. Struggling in life and just guessing whenever things will get better. Sitting there is my getaway, no problems, no worries, no one to bother me, no tears, just the moment.  Even when I know someone else has it worse than me and behind it all I am blessed, but I’m slowly losing myself, trying to find my way back. I am 17, not an average 17 year old.  Born in New Orleans, Louisiana.  Somehow believing I’m from Tokyo, Japan.  My thoughts get way out of hand and I have no control over them.  My mind wonders off in space when I’m trying to focus in class.  I have no idea what I want to be in life and I may not know for a while or maybe when I’m in college.  I just want to travel the world, I know there’s more to life than just this. I know there is happiness somewhere.  I know I may not be living in reality and maybe that’s why it feels like everyone is against me.  Against me and my thoughts.  My dreams. I’ve come to the conclusion I am not normal.  I believe when I get older I will write myself into fame, into finding something, doing all the things I want to do. With a bunch of people doubting me and everyone laughing at me.  I have no problem with that. I'm just trying to prove them or at least someone wrong. I have something, something I want to share with the world.  Questions I want to ask, things I want to know. I walk real fast. I’m attracted to white guys. I often wonder why we go to bed worrying, knowing that we may not wake up the next morning. No one likes to think that way so eventually we worry ourselves to death. I hate orange candy. I’m addicted to water. My generation is based upon pain pills and Marijuana. I have a guitar that collects dust. My first time lighting a cigarette was in the 5^th grade. I plan on waiting till I’m married. I’m catholic. Sometimes people may have a big imagination or get the wrong interpretation, so I don’t believe everything the bible says. Believe me, God is real. Black on the outside, white in the inside. I’ve been called an Oreo since Middle School. I always feel like I’m alone. I read books to join another world. Its amazing the places a book can take you. Im Dannielle by the way, and that’s with 2 N’s. I hope you’ll remember me.